Jody Serey’s Reflection

Holiday Dinners
and Red Jell-O

My family is small, so we try to celebrate every occasion with great warmth, but not a lot of formality. My sister Buffy and I grew up with holiday traditions steeped in the shining of silver and the endless hours of ironing linens and sharpening carving knives. Then many years ago, she and I found ourselves in Arizona, and we were glad to create new traditions.

Fortunately, we married men who are happy if the menu includes at least one full gravy boat, some kind of bread, and a couple of choices of dessert items. They don’t care if their plates are china, plastic, or paper. And as my husband David says often, “It’s getting together that’s the important thing. But of course, the food is great, too.”

One “dish” that is always present at a holiday or birthday meal is red Jell-o. It’s a family ritual that finds its beginnings with my father, who loved unadorned, nothing added, unadulterated Jell-o. Dad would eat any flavor (color?), but red was his favorite. So, because we miss him even after decades of his earthly absence, we prepare Jell-o that we include as a tribute to our father and grandfather. We have expanded the memorial tradition. In recent years, the bowl of red Jell-o also remembers my son, Nate, who inherited his grandfather’s love of Jell-o and is probably requesting it at every heavenly feast.

Families are woven together by much more than biology, shared religious traditions, and cultural similarities. The ones that remain intact also feature bonds made of tears, regrets, memories, joy, grief, hope, stories around a shared table, and funny little quirks that we might not understand but we grow to love. For instance, my dad’s insistence that red Jell-o make it to even the most elegant of gatherings.

Proverbs 15:17 says, “Better a small serving of vegetables with love than a fattened calf with hatred.” These words emphasize the importance of love over lavishness at the table.

Ecclesiastes 9:7 urges us to, “Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for God has already approved what you do.” I like to think that this verse reveals that the ones above are happy when we can be together with nothing but gratitude that we all made it to the table. We should celebrate with whatever is on our plates as long as we love each other.

So, drink your wine, slice the turkey, or dig into the red Jell-o – just do it with a grateful heart.

Dear God,
As we gather at this table, we give thanks for the food before us,
the hands that prepared it, and the love that surrounds us.
We remember, with full hearts, the ones who once sat beside us,
those whose laughter filled this room, whose stories shaped our own.
Though they are not here in body, they are here in spirit,
woven into the fabric of our lives and carried in every shared memory.
Bless this meal, and bless this family — those present and those above the reach of our arms that stretch ever towards them.

May we honor their lives with joy, with kindness, and with the strength of our togetherness.
And may this table always be a place of peace, connection, and love.
Amen.